meh

im stoned and so sick and so sleepy. I slept all day but im so sick it doesnt matter. Not to whine or anything. Anyway..j think about the action of typing too much. I learned my love language is quality time. Meaning, if you take the time to get to know me and spend time with me, make time, show me you care through time and give me your undivided attention I feel loved. Thats when on a scale of 1 to 10 i feel a 10. Cool right? not everyone speaks the same language and we even speak different dialects.

Money is horrible it influences every aspect of a persons life. I could live in a box as long as I had love, and as much as people all love to say money doesnt matter to them, it does. I like nice things but honestly I could do without the money. Sometimes I think about running away, I'd wanna take my cats and my dog. Ive been thinking about getting a puppy. I need a friend I can take everywhere. Who will run and play with me. So I wont feel so lonely all the time. In terms of pets Nikkos great but idk he isnt as affectionate he likes to sleep alone in the corner of the bed. on the floor. He's a loner like that. Back to what I was saying. For me money exists soley because it has to. Someone invented it and now I have to pay ir to live where I live. I drive a car. To put gas in that car. Money is always involved. It runs everything. Our reason for being is driven for money and it makes me sad. Why cant we be driven by our passions why cant work be something we want and love to do like paint or write. and our payment is feeling good and doing it because we want to. Then we have love. No money we barter. This world depresses me, I dont belong here.

im tired and out of it. you dont know what you have till its gone. seriously.

kitten cuddles. and a nap. I miss my car and phone and feeling like I had a purpose and being happy and loved and awesome.

meh oh and im obese

night.